In an effort to be like Jennifer, I will post about a product that I recently purchased. However, I am not like Jennifer in that she knows how to do those cool little links where all you do is click on the word and it takes you to whatever you're referencing and I DO NOT. I have tried to learn, I have read the directions, I cannot do it yet. I will keep trying. Today, however, you will have to learn about Jennifer's post by clicking on her full web address, which I am about to type out like a neanderthal (www.thestarrfamily.blogspot.com), and then looking around until you locate the post about her new $800 Dyson vacuum cleaner. She did not say it cost that much, but I have looked at them in the stores. I don't really remember how much they cost, but I know it was enough to make me faint.
Anyway, my post is about the new Clorox Anywhere Spray. You've seen the commercials...supermom goes around spraying her counters, her head of romaine lettuce, down her baby's throat...it is gentle enough to use on all of these things, yet kills 99.9% of all bacteria!!! Sounds great! I bought it for around three bucks. I used it this morning and I was immediately suspicious because it was so unbelievably mild. I didn't even get the airy, spring-like scent that I was sure it would have. So I looked at the back. Ingredients: Sodium Hypochlorite (0.0095%) and Other (99.9905%). I was betting that "Other" was actually "Water", and from what I remember from high school chemistry, "Sodium Hypochlorite" sounded a lot like "salt, water, and chlorine", but I got online to find out. The first thing I saw was on Wikipedia, which did in fact confirm my suspicion that Sodium Hypochlorite was "salt from hypochloric acid (not hydrochloric acid, so don't freak out)...in other words, chlorinated water, otherwise known as household bleach. AHA! However, the scientific jargon was confusing me, so I found another website (www.iniardwatch.com/?p=80 --seriously, somebody teach Cave Woman Becky how to do the link thing), which appears to be the Smoking Gun of consumer household products. This smart lady has done far more research than me (saving me lots of minutes) and has discovered that this miracle spray that Clorox sold me for three big ones is five cents worth of household bleach (about a half teaspoon), lots and lots of water, and a little bit of vinegar thrown in to lower the ph-balance, thus making it safe to spray in your kids' faces. It's basically watered-down pool water. Besides that, you have to saturate your surface and leave it for two whole minutes before the wipedown...now I've wasted my time and my money! She also noted that while it does kill bacteria, it does not kill viruses and fungi. To kill those, you need disinfectants and sterilants. So I guess it's back to the old Lysol spray for me (Wal-mart brand, of course.)
I suppose the whole point of this combined rant-fest and chemistry lesson is to tell you not to buy it, but really what I want to say is that even though Jennifer spent $800 on a vacuum cleaner and will consequently have to wear contacts for five more years, she still got a better deal than me.
Mrs. Marjorie wouldn't smile with her mouth open in this picture because her teeth were green from the snow-cone she had just eaten. I was mean and made Patrick get a coconut-flavored one because it was clear, but he didn't care...he loved it! It was really good...tasted like a Pina Colada, without the booze, of course.
This is Miss Jennifer, the student aide in Patrick's class. She is so sweet to those kids...Patrick really loves her, too.
